Office Coffee Machines

DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN….?
All the girls had ugly gym uniforms?
It took five minutes for the TV warm up?

Nearly everyone’s Mom was at home when the kids got home from school?

Nobody owned a purebred dog?

When a quarter was a decent allowance?

You’d reach into a muddy gutter for a penny?

Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces?

All your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done every day and wore high heels?

You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking, all for free, every time? And you didn’t pay for air? And, you got trading stamps to boot?

Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box?

It was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a real restaurant with your parents?

They threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed. . . and they did?

When a 57 Chevy was everyone’s dream car…to cruise, peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and people went steady?
No one ever asked where the car keys were because they were always in the car, in the ignition, and the doors were never locked?

Lying on your back in the grass with your friends?
and saying things like, ‘That cloud looks like a… ‘?
Playing baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game?

Stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger?

And with all our progress, don’t you just wish, just once, you could slip back in time and savor the slower pace? Share it with the children of today.

When being sent to the principal’s office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited the student at home?

Basically we were in fear for our lives, but it wasn’t because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc. Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat! But we survived because their love was greater than the threat.

Send this on to someone who can still remember Nancy Drew, the Hardy?
Boys, Laurel and Hardy, Howdy Dowdy and the Peanut Gallery, the LoneRanger, The Shadow Knows, Nellie Bell , Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk. . ..as well as summers filled with bike rides, baseball games, Hula Hoops, bowling and visits to the pool, and eating Kool-Aid powder with sugar.
Didn’t that feel good, just to go back and say, ‘Yeah, I remember that’?

I am sharing this with you today because it ended with a double dog dare to pass it on. To remember what a double dog dare is, read on. And remember that the perfect age is somewhere between old enough to know better and too young to care.
How many of these do you remember?
Candy &nb sp;c i garettes

Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside.

Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles.

Coffee shops with table side jukeboxes.

Blackjack, Clove and Teaberry chewing gum.

Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers.

Newsreels before the movie.
P. F. Fliers.

Telephone numbers with a word prefix…(Raymond 4-601). Party lines.

Peashooters.
Howdy Dowdy.

Hi-Fi’s & 45 RPM records.

78 RPM records!

Green Stamps.

Mimeograph paper.
The Fort Apache Play Set.
Do you remember a time when….
De c isions were made by going ‘Eeny-meeny-miney-moe’?
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, ‘Do Over!’?
‘Race issue’ meant arguing about who ran the fastest?

Catching the fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening?

It wasn’t odd to have two or three ‘Best Friends’?

The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was ‘cooties’?

Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot?

Saturday morning cartoons weren’t 30-minute commercials for action figures?

‘Oly-Oly-oxen-free’ made perfect sense?
Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was cause for giggles?
The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team?
War was a c a rd game?

Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle?
Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin?

Water balloons were the ultimate weapon?

If you can remember most or all of these, then you have lived!!!!!!!
Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from their ‘grown-up’ life . .
I double-dog-dare-ya!

I know this is super long, but thought some of you could use a " I remember when". Have a great day and Happy Halloween everyone
ahh guys I wasnt around long when most of this was going on..lol I was a late 70’s baby so missed most of it. But there are a few things I do remember.
Also there are some homes with cloths lines in the backyard, penny candy is still 2 for 1 but its rare. Just look in my parents back yard..lol

All the girls had ugly gym uniforms?

It took five minutes for the TV warm up?

Nearly everyone’s Mom was at home when the kids got
home from school?

Nobody owned a purebred dog?

When a quarter was a decent allowance?

You’d reach into a muddy gutter for a penny?

Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces?

All your male teachers wore neckties and female
teachers had

their hair done every day and wore high heels?

You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas
pumped,

without asking, all for free, every time?

And you didn’t pay for air? And, you got trading
stamps to boot?

Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels
hidden inside the box?

It was considered a great privilege to be taken out
to dinner

at a real restaurant with your parents?

They threatened to keep kids back a grade if they
failed. . ..and they did?

When a 57 Chevy was everyone’s dream car…to cruise,

peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and
people went steady?

No one ever asked where the car keys were

because they were always in the car,

in the ignition, and the doors were never locked?

Lying on your back in the grass with your friends

and saying things like, "That cloud looks like a …"

and playing baseball with no adults to help kids with
the rules of the game?

Stuff from the store came without safety caps and
hermetic seals

because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect
stranger?

And with all our progress, don’t you just wish, just
once,

you could slip back in time and savor the slower
pace,

and share it with the children of today?

When being sent to the principal’s office was nothing

compared to the fate that awaited the student at
home?

Basically we were in fear for our lives,

but it wasn’t because of drive-by shootings, drugs,
gangs, etc.

Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger
threat!

But we survived because their love was greater than
the threat.

Send this on to someone who can still remember

Nancy Drew, the Hardy Boys, Laurel and Hardy,

Howdy Dowdy and the Peanut Gallery,

the Lone Ranger, The Shadow Knows,

Nellie Bell, Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk.

As well as summers filled with bike rides, baseball
games,

Hula Hoops, bowling and visits to the pool,

and eating Kool-Aid powder with sugar.

Didn’t that feel good, just to go back and say,
"Yeah, I remember that"?

I am sharing this with you today

because it ended with a double dog dare to pass it on.

To remember what a double dog dare is, read on.

And remember that the perfect age is somewhere between

old enough to know better and too young to care.

How many of these do you remember?

Candy cigarettes

Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water
inside

Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles

Coffee shops with tableside jukeboxes

Blackjack, Clove and Teaberry chewing gum

Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard
stoppers

Newsreels before the movie

P.F. Fliers

Telephone numbers with a word prefix….(Temple
4-601).

Party lines

Peashooters

Howdy Dowdy

45 RPM records

Green Stamps

Hi-Fi’s

Metal ice cubes trays with levers

Mimeograph paper

Beanie and Cecil

Roller-skate keys

Cork pop guns

Drive ins

Studebakers

Washtub wringers

The Fuller Brush Man

Reel-To-Reel tape recorders

Tinkertoys

Erector Sets

The Fort Apache Play Set

Lincoln Logs

15 cent McDonald hamburgers

5 cent packs of baseball cards -

with that awful pink slab of bubble gum

Penny candy

35 cent a gallon gasoline

Jiffy Pop popcorn

Do you remember a time when…

Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-moe"?

Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "Do
Over!"?

"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest?

Catching the fireflies could happily occupy an entire
evening?

It wasn’t odd to have two or three "Best Friends"?

The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex
was "cooties"?

Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a
slingshot?

A foot of snow was a dream come true?

Saturday morning cartoons weren’t 30-minute
commercials for action figures?

"Oly-oly-oxen-free" made perfect sense?

Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was
cause for giggles?

The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a
team?

War was a card game?

Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into
a motorcycle?

Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin?

Water balloons were the ultimate weapon?

If you can remember most or all of these, then you
have lived!!!!!!!

Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from

their "grown-up" life . . .

DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN…?

All the girls had ugly gym uniforms?

It took five minutes for the TV warm up?
Nearly everyone’s Mom was at home when the kids got home from school?

Nobody owned a purebred dog?

When a quarter was a decent allowance?

You’d reach into a muddy gutter for a penny?

Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces?

All your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had
their hair done every day and wore high heels?
You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped,
without asking, all for free, every time?
And you didn’t pay for air? And, you got trading stamps to boot?

Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box?

It was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner
at a real restaurant with your parents?

They threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed. . and they did?
When a 57 Chevy was everyone’s dream car…to cruise,
peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and people went steady?

No one ever asked where the car keys were
because they were always in the car,
in the ignition, and the doors were never locked?
Lying on your back in the grass with your friends
and saying things like, "That cloud looks like a "
and playing baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game?
Stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals
because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger?
And with all our progress, don’t you just wish, just once,
you could slip back in time and savor the slower pace,
and share it with the children of today?
When being sent to the principal’s office was nothing
compared to the fate that awaited the student at home?
Basically we were in fear for our lives,
but it wasn’t because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc.
Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat!
But we survived because their love was greater than the threat.
who can still remember
Nancy Drew, the Hardy Boys, Laurel and Hardy,
Howdy Dowdy and the Peanut Gallery,
the Lone Ranger, The Shadow Knows,
Nellie Bell, Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk.
As well as summers filled with bike rides, baseball games,
Hula Hoops, bowling and visits to the pool,
and eating Kool-Aid powder with sugar.
Didn’t that feel good, just to go back and say, "Yeah, I remember that"?
To remember what a double dog dare is, read on.
And remember that the perfect age is somewhere between
old enough to know better and too young to care.
How many of these do you remember?
Candy cigarettes
Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside
Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles
Coffee shops with tableside jukeboxes
Blackjack, Clove and Teaberry chewing gum
Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
Newsreels before the movie
P.F. Fliers
Telephone numbers with a word prefix…(Raymond 4-601).
Party lines
Peashooters
Howdy Dowdy
45 RPM records
Green Stamps
Hi-Fi’s
Metal ice cubes trays with levers
Mimeograph paper
Beanie and Cecil
Roller-skate keys
Cork pop guns
Drive ins
Studebakers
Washtub wringers
The Fuller Brush Man
Reel-To-Reel tape recorders
Tinkertoys
Erector Sets
The Fort Apache Play Set
Lincoln Logs
15 cent McDonald hamburgers
5 cent packs of baseball cards –
with that awful pink slab of bubble gum
Penny candy
35 cent a gallon gasoline
Jiffy Pop popcorn
Do you remember a time when…
Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-moe"?
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "Do Over!"?
"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest?
Catching the fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening?
It wasn’t odd to have two or three "Best Friends"?

The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was "cooties"?
Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot?
A foot of snow was a dream come true?

Saturday morning cartoons weren’t 30-minute commercials for action figures?
"Oly-oly-oxen-free" made perfect sense?
Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was cause for giggles?

The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team?
War was a card game?
Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle?
Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin?
Water balloons were the ultimate weapon?

If you can remember most or all of these, then you have lived!!!!!!!

I am sure most of you wont read this but what the hell. if you do read this and r a pc user can answer me why pc people still wouldnt switch to mac?

here is the link to the article with comments from users
http://ptech.allthingsd.com/20070802/fusion-is-latest-way-for-macs-to-operate-windows-pc-software/

any’s Macintosh computers. While Mac sales still account for only a small share of world-wide computer sales, they have been growing three to five times as fast as overall PC sales.

In classrooms and offices, homes and coffee shops, Macs are far more visible in the U.S. than they were just a few years ago. Part of this success results from the fact that Macs are excellent machines that handle the most important and common tasks as well as — or better than — computers running Microsoft Windows.

But the new popularity of the Mac is also partly due to the fact that it can now run Windows along with Apple’s superior Mac OS X operating system. That means that if there’s a program you need that comes only in a Windows version, you can run it on any current Mac model, speedily and with

I have never been able to wake up with ease… I would so much rather sleep than get up for work (wouldn’t we all?)! I feel pretty sure that this is a more difficult task for me than it is for others; I’ve always had a sleep-thing going on. And there’s an added challenge in the fact that with my job, I am the only person who monitors what time I show up to work – I work in corporate marketing and am at one of several offices and/or or one of many retailers every day – which makes it harder to fight the temptation of sleeping in vs. waking up at 6 on the dot every morning.

Please feel free to throw some things out there as I brainstorm new ways to make the challenge of waking up a do-able experience!! I will likely need to tackle it with a combination of different solutions.
(Note: don’t mention depression or thyroid etc. – I’ve ruled those out a long time ago…. and I have the nighttime sleep covered. Just asking for tips & things for waking up in the mornings)

If it makes it easier… add to, dispute, or comment on these ideas:
— get new haircuts, clothes, makeup on a frequent-enouth basis & set out clothes the night-before to add motivation to the wakeup process?
— make a routine of setting out an adderall (i get a monthly script) by my bed and set an alarm to take it 30 min. before I get up?
— set up coffee machine the night before so that all I have to do when I get up is press the button?
— turn the TV on as soon as my first alarm goes off?
— wake up to music instead of harsh alarmclock beeps?

1. NIIT: Not Interested in IT

2. WIPRO: Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output

3. HCL: Hidden Costs & Losses

4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions

5. INFOSYS : Infinitely Offline Systems

6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping

7. BAAN : Beggars Association and Nerds

8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines

9. SATYAM: Sad and Tired Yelling Away Madly

10. PARAM: Puzzled and Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors

11. C-DOT : Coffee during Office Timings

12. AT&T : All Troubles & Terrible

13. CMC : Coffee, Meals and Comfort

14. DEC : Drifting & Exhausted Computers

15. BFL : Brainwash first and Let them go

17. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd.

18. PSI : Peculiar Symptoms of India

19. ORACLE: On-line Romance And Chatting

IT Company Full Names…

1 . NIIT : Not Interested in IT

2. WIPRO : Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output

3. HCL : Hidden Costs & Losses

4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions

5. INFOSYS :Inferior Offline Systems

6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping

7. BAAN : Beggars Association and Nerds

8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines

9. SATYAM : Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly

10. PARAM : Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors

11. C-DOT : Coffee During Office Timings

12. AT&T : All Troubles & Terrible

13. CMC : Coffee, Meals and Comfort

14. DEC : Drifting & Exhausted Computers

15. BFL : Brainwash First and Let them go

17. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd.

18. PSI : Pec

1. NIIT: Not Interested in IT

2. WIPRO: Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output

3. HCL: Hidden Costs & Losses

4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions

5. INFOSYS : Infinitely Offline Systems

6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping

7. BAAN : Beggars Association and Nerds

8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines

9. SATYAM: Sad and Tired Yelling Away Madly

10. PARAM: Puzzled and Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors

11. C-DOT : Coffee during Office Timings

12. AT&T : All Troubles & Terrible

13. CMC : Coffee, Meals and Comfort

14. DEC : Drifting & Exhausted Computers

15. BFL : Brainwash first and Let them go

17. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd.

18. PSI : Peculiar Symptoms of India

19. ORACLE: On-line Romance And Chatting

Did you like them? Star please
Have a nice day and keep smiling!

Funny Short Forms of IT Companies
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1. NIIT: Not Interested in IT

2. WIPRO: Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output

3. HCL: Hidden Costs & Losses

4. TCS: Totally Confusing Solutions

5. INFOSYS: Inferior Offline Systems

6. HUGHES: Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping

7. BAAN: Beggars Association And Nerds

8. IBM: Implicitly Boring Machines

9. SATYAM: Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly

10. PARAM: Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors

11. C-DOT: Coffee During Office Timings

12. CMC: Coffee, Meals and Comfort

13. DELL: Deplorable Equipment & lacklusters

14. PSI: Peculiar Symptoms of India.

15. ORACLE: On-line Romance And Chatting with Lady Employees.

Hello everyone. I have an assignment to do, and I need some pretty die-hard watchers to take this quiz for me, you don’t mind. It’ll take less than 5 minutes and you’d be helping out a fellow human. You can just list out your answers and if you don’t know the answer then simply guess!Thanks in advance.

The Office

1. Why does Dwight throw his phone into a river from the top of a helipad?
a) Jim convinces him that people are listening in on his phone conversations.
b) Jim and Pam have made him think that he’s working for the CIA.
c) Jim won’t stop calling him.
d) Jim convinces him that phones are not allowed on helicopters.
2. Jim conditioned Dwight to desire a breath mint at the sound of what?
a) a doorbell
b) a car’s horn
c) his computer rebooting
d) the ring of a phone
3. After Jim finds Dwight’s wallet in the parking lot and returns it to him without tampering with it at all, Dwight does what?
a) He believes him and gives Jim a big hug.
b) He doesn’t believe him and plots a diabolical plan against Jim.
c) He believes him and since he hates feeling indebted, becomes unnervingly nice to Jim.
d) He doesn’t believe him and cancels all his credit cards.
4. Jim wires Dwight’s cell phone and office phone to what?
a) his headset
b) a random telephone number in India
c) Toby’s daughter’s cell phone
d) an automatic recording of, “The office of the mediocrity man”
5. Why did Dwight tackle Stanley, who was about to sip some coffee?
a) Jim convinced Dwight that there was Kryptonite in the coffee.
b) Jim told Dwight that artificial beet flavoring was used to make the coffee.
c) Jim sent him a message through “Future Dwight” that the coffee was poisoned.
d) Jim told Dwight that Stanley butchered a goose in the wrong way and Dwight was baffled and furious at the ignorance of humans.
6. Jim and Pam secretly hummed in high pitches, manipulating Dwight into thinking he was the only one hearing it and that he had what?
a) Obliviousitis
b) Pretenditis
c) Gullabitis
d) Fakeitis
7. Why does Dwight swiftly accept a bag of nickels from Jim and begin to furiously insert them into the vending machine?
a) Jim tells him that buying out the whole machine spews back all the money ever put in it.
b) He is led on to believe that buying food with nickels makes him more superior.
c) He is told that Secret Service scouts look for people who buy food with nickels.
d) Jim puts all his desk supplies in the vending machine.
8. What did Jim replace all of Dwight’s pens and pencils with?
a) crayons
b) Sharpies
c) gel pens
d) paintbrushes and different color paint
9. When Dwight wins salesman of the year, Jim offers to help him how?
a) He convinces him that he should be arrogant and insult everyone else individually.
b) He gives him examples of good speeches to emulate, such as Mussolini’s.
c) Jim dresses him in a tuxedo and teaches him to speak in an Italian accent.
d) He gives him an earpiece and tells him to repeat everything he says, no exceptions.
10. Jim paid all the other employees in the office .00 to call Dwight what all day?
a) Dwayd
b) Dweeb
c) Dwennon
d) Dwayne
11. Why does Dwight heatedly begin to try to move things with his mind?
a) Jim says he’ll give him an unopened Battlestar Galactica action figure if he can do it.
b) Jim tells him only the true beet farmers can do it.
c) He sees Jim do it with the coat rack.
d) Jim convinces him there’s a national telekinetic league competition and he starts training.
12. Jim places a computer macro on Dwight’s computer to do what?
a) Shut down the computer every time Dwight opens his work files
b) Replace, when typed in all circumstances, “Dwight” with “Diapers”
c) To randomly open certain documents at specified intervals every day, .
d) To insert a heading of “Dwight Fart Shrute” on every document.

Thanks again.

I haven’t been to the field in almost two years, and even then I had framed tents and heating (warm meals, shower runs, ect.) I haven’t slept outdoors since WLC, I work in an air conditioned office, drink coffee from a mug, don’t own a canteen, and have a chair with adjustable settings and lumbar support.
I have cable TV in my office, doughnuts, and a vending machine. Even when I was in that country we invaded I did little-no work and ate chicken nuggets everyday. My biggest concern at the moment is that the vending machine is out of Dr. Pepper and my mouse pad is getting worn (looks very unprofessional.) The worst thing that can happen to me right now is that I’ll have to go to the range where I have overhead cover to protect me from rain, because firing a rifle in the rain is just nuts. I do PT though, sometimes they even make us do it outside if the gym is too full. I am considering removing my airborne wings and combat patch to be even more poguish, any suggestions?
Thanks for the input Tool, but you didn’t actually answer the question…..
Yeah Andy, I guess I’ll have to take of my AAM that I got for running 2 km of fiber cable.
I guess nobody’s ever heard of satire……
Everyone except Andy is telling me how to be less poguish, they’re missing the point entirely. Would a moustache be good or bad for my goals in this matter?
I carry a backpack around, they wont let me have a handbag. But I counteract the anti-pougeness of this by only carrying school books, Dilbert collections, apple juice, and Oreos in the military styled backpack.
Combat Soldier come into my office? Ha ha ha, good one.
Thanks Leroy, that’s dead-on. I actually chose not to pursue the CAB I could have got for mortars because I knew it would hurt my future endevor to be the ultimate pogue.
Mini-frig Andy? I have a full sived frig with a freezer, gotta keep my hot pockets cold, (untill I want them to be hot obviously, that’s why I have the microwave.)
Your right Leroy, that guy was really mad and I guess him and Tool didn’t get issued a sense of humor. My favorite is ppl who argue that they’ve been to war but don’t have a combat patch because they weren’t authorized, and then they consider Bright Star or something like that a deployment.

I am 40 and have 3 children, ages 24, 19 and 17. I got divorced as my children were very small. Five years ago I met a man with who I would like to spend the rest of my life with.

He is 58 and has two sons ( 23 and 32 ). His older son has a good running Company himself. Unfortunately he has a very unkind wife. She never wanted children and ( 000000PPPSSSSSS ) accidentally almost as the relationship was breaking up she became pregnant. The little fellow is now 6 months old his father has to feed him, change his diapers, bath him and, and ,and……. Even though they live in the same house the grandmother is not allowed to see her grandchild so things are not very rosy in this family. My partner’s wife thought once a grandchild is born it would hook him more into the family. My Partner’s ( let’s say ) daughter-in-law had been working in his Company 17 years. After giving birth she should have started work in the beginning of January but she has not mentioned anything jet. She had to go to hospital in the 5th month of pregnancy. Although I had not much knowledge of her work I had to take over immediately. My partner’s family didn’t expect that I ( never learned office work and never attended german classes ) would manage with all the work. With a little overtime I managed very well. So they underestimated my abilities and so now they show me as if they except me ( I am doughting it ).

His younger son is very spoiled and is not capable of doing anything at all and he will be taking over the Company from his father ( I am very suspicious if he could manage it ). For example when he is in the Company his only interests are if all the light bulbs are the same Volts or if the coffee machine is switched off. Or he shifts things from here to there. When he is in the Company a few days my partner and his younger son don’t get along with each other at all. He doesn’t take any interest in the sales and orders or what’s going on around and the Company’s every day procedures. He only sees the Bank Balance at the end of the month. But one thing is sure my partner’s children are well secured so ( normally ) they don’t have to worry.

My partner has been separated since 21 years ( not officially because of some Taxation reasons ) and his wife has been doing the whole paperwork for the Company. Many people say ( also family members ), it’s only because she always wanted to take control over him and she has told others that when he is old and grey he will be sitting on her sofa.
Also when other people are present she made him feel bad because he left her and he was never there for the children when they were ill and, and, and…….
She has been in a relationship with a married man since 20 years. This man stays 4 days at home with his wife and three days with her.
And because of that he has done more for his children then a father who had been living day and night with his children as in intact families.

My partner is a very good businessman and we have decided to open up a Business in India ( we live in Germany ). In this Business we both have shares of 50% each. We should be getting married in September 2010.
Without each other we are unable to do Business, he brings the knowledge and the money ( we lend the money, let’s say from Company X and pay it back with Interest in 5 years. Company X also belongs to my partner Taxation advantages in Germany. In other words nobody brings the money. The Business we are opening will pay itself in the end. So this means in the end the Business in India doesn’t cost us anything and the Company X makes a profit.) and I will be managing it as I was born in India and can speak Punjabi, Hindi, English and German.

The thing is that I would like to have another child and my time is running out. His wife and children think they would in this case inherit less because my unborn child could take their shares. His best ( ??? ) friend has told me that me having a child would be very cruel and I shouldn’t do this to his wife and his children. Because of these problems three earlier relationships have broken up for my partner in the last ten years. It does not suit them that we are getting married.

But for my child I don’t want anything from them i would be happy if we would be successful in India so that I can leave something behind for my children. He says his children would never go to India and take over the Business and he is only doing this for my children. I think to claim a large amount of money India is not far away, they could do it sitting in Germany.

My questions:

1) Is it cruel to want a child with this man?
2) Do his children have the right to inherit the 50% of his shares in India because at the time we registered the Company he is married to their mother ?

Anything they have earned in their marriage they should keep and I don’t want anything from them.
But what I work for in the future they should leave it for me and my chi

I used to chat to this woman at the coffee machine at work. Then I left the company. Now I see her on the street as I work close by.

I tried to stop her to say hi how are you etc but she quickly went into her office. The next time I asked her if she was upset about something to which she replied "I know we used to chat but we were not friends and she doesnt want to pursue the friendship"

I was merely trying to have a "hi how are you" converation with someone I used to chat to. I hadnt even mentioned taking it further.

Am I expecting too much or is this woman a little odd or rude? Just because I left and we were not friends is no reason not to speak to someone.

For me it has to be my prom photo, me and my friends had a group photo, only our group was too big so we were split into two, one group boys, one girls and I come under boys cos I’m a male-to-female transsexual and still currently a boy and it was just a great photo and it will always remind me of my last year at school, my friends and everyone who’s made my life great and worth living and it is just a perfect photo and it looks almost like it was from a sitcom set in an office, lol. With even named our characters, i’m a the guy who’s always near the coffee machine, everyone knows me but no one knows what i do or what i’m paid for, not even the boss, lol.

What’s your favourite photo of you and your friends?

I like this girl in office . We got to know each others names while collating info at office for a common cause. This girl in question speaks well if approached, enquire about personal stuff and reciprocates well. But she tends to avoid eye contact as well as kinda ignores me when she is with her friends. I know she sees me cause no one can miss a person at a distance of 5 feet unless they want to … The other day when I had invited her for a party casually saying I have invited her friends too, she said that she would " love to come" but had some training etc which was genuine. When she asked what the occasion was , I had to tell her that it was my promotion and she shook hands with me and also remembered that day correctly saying what I was wearing that promotion day !!!!.. I know she notices me and is struggling to look at me sometime. some times from the side of my eye i can see her look at me and when I look she too looks and turns away – no smile at all – as if she was dealing with a stranger. whats on her mind .. She normally takes route to the coffee machine thru where i sit , the other day she saw me speaking to another female colleague of mine and took the opposite route which felt like to me " oh i should avoid this guy ". Can someone help me decipher this behavior.
Thanks all .. God bless you … Shall definitely take the lead and ask her out at an appropriate time..

bandaid , to answer your question.. she has friends( boys) whom i pressume she knows for more than a year now and she speaks well, sometimes I see her in a resturant with them .. i guess its more of a time thing than anything else … your valuable advice too would be great ..

Came back to work after the xmas break, one of the hot office girls who seems to delight in givng me the cold shoulder was getting some drinks from the coffee machine when I wondered past, I was actually on my way to a meeting, but did intend to get a coffee. So I thought be polite and said ‘good morning’ in a zippy way, she replied dryly ‘good morning’ in an icey way, then I thought screw this I can’t be bothered to wait, (i hate waiting), I’ll go to my meeting and get the coffee later, so I said ‘I’ll come back later’, and walked away. Later on I thought, how cool was that, serves her right, if I had waited for my coffee it would have given her the opportunity to ignore me standing there and make me feel like an awkward geek, instead quite inadvertently I gave her some of her own treatment….am I a sad fool?

a woman standing by the coffee machine in work is approached by a male colleague,he leans over and whispers "wow your hair smells great".immediatly she storms into her supivisors office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harrasment charge.her supervisor says "but whats wrong with saying your hair smells nice?" to which she replies,"hes a midget".
sorry,put this in wrong section,hope it makes you laugh anyway.

I really like this girl at work, but need advice on getting things started?

Weve only spoken 3 or 4 times in the lift and at the drinks machine, I introduced myself and we shook hands.
(was this a good start???)

Now what???? Ive never been good at talking to the ladies so I was wondering if I could get some advice on how to go about getting to know her better. (All I know so far is her name)

She works on the same floor as me in an office block, but we are in different teams. I never have to go to her team, she never has to come to mine.

She seems to like me, but I am not sure if she is just being polite.

I’m a little new to the dating scene, so any advice would be nice. Plus I think me turning up at the lifts and coffee machine at the same time ‘might’ be wearing a bit thin now!!!

Thanks.

Why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways?

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

Can I yell "movie" in a crowded firehouse?

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

How do a fool and his money GET together?

Why does Hawaii have interstate highways?

How is it that a building burns up as it burns down?

If a train station is where the train stops, what is a workstation?

If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?

If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax?

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

What hair color do they put on the driver’s licenses of bald men?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds" fee on money they already know you don’t have?

Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines?

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?

What are Preparation A through Preparation G?

In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?

Did Washington flash a quarter when asked for ID?

How come there aren’t B batteries?

If the post office has machines that can sort snail mail at 1000’s of times per minute, then why do they give it to a little old man on a bike to deliver?

How do "Do not walk on the grass" signs get there?

Why do black olives come in cans and green olives come in jars?

Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?

How is it possible to have a civil war?

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2?

Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?

If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?

Crime doesn’t pay…does that mean that my job is a crime?

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

How do you know that honesty is the best policy until you have tried some of the others?

How do you throw away a garbage can?

How does a thermos know if the drink should be hot or cold?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

Do you realize how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?

If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?

If you’re in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

What happens to an 18 hour bra after 18 hours?

Why didn’t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do hot dogs come 10 to a package and hot dog buns only 8?

Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings and then put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up?

Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman’s chest, but he ducks when the gun is thrown at him?
opinions everyone?

Does anybody know what is the best way to market a coffee and tea brand for a small start-up firm with limited budget? The business in itself is not type of Starbucks or something similar to that but it is a coffee wholesaler supplier. The business is going to supply restaurants, offices, casinos etc and I am looking forward to knowing how would one go about marketing it.

By the way, does anybody know any type of weigh, fill, seal packaging machine that does them all at a reasonable price? If so, can you write the name please?

CH 1
Rain poured down on an empty bus stop making dull thuds on the tin roof, and as thunder rolled in the distance a bold figure slipped out of the cover of the stop and into the oncoming torrent of precipitation. Head bent and shoulders hunched the figure pulled his coat more tightly around his frame and picked up his pace. He passed under a dimming, busted streetlight as another crack of thunder rolled loudly echoing through the deserted town square. The figure made it to the end of the flickering lamplight before virtually melting into the night, going as silently as he had arrived.

Tap, tap, tap-tap, tap. The sound of fingers running swiftly over computer keys resounded through an empty office. Allen Beaumont sat checking reports and filing documents.
Finally, leaned back in his stiff computer chair, the kind that can give you the posture of a worm if you’re not careful, and sighed. He stared blankly at his computer screen for what must have been the twentieth time that night and let his thoughts pull him away. He closed his eyes and thought of Paris; his home and where he had had the best days of his life. He thought of the small, but quaint, café he worked cooking and waiting tables at. It had seemed then he had everything he could ever want, until the rent sky rocked and the owner, Jeff, a personal friend had been forced to close the restaurant down. Allen had been forced to find a new job as an accountant at a local business. Recently, the company had expanded and Allen had landed himself where he sat now. Tokyo, Japan, one of the most industrialized cities in the world. He hated everything about it: the people, the crowded streets, the noise. It seemed a hundred times worse than Paris. He started as he heard the sound of sirens far below him. He was glad at least he worked in a remoter part of the city, and even more so that the building he worked in was so far above the chaotic city below. He stood quietly and stretched his aching back muscles while still trying to figure out how he got coned into working overtime, again. He moved quietly down the hall and into a small lounge room where he preceded to search for the coffee machine. Usually, he never drank coffee at work because of its tendency to make him…unpleasant, but tonight he decided it wouldn’t hurt. He found the machine and a pack of instant coffee which he put inside and then slid his mug under to catch the falling liquid. As he waited he looked up at the wall clock and whistled in disbelief, it was late. It was much later than he ever chose to stay at work, but he had decided he needed to get a few more things done before he went home. He hoped the coffee would keep him awake. He jumped in surprise as the coffee machine blared out its standard beep to announce it was finished. “Fast…” he murmured as he grabbed the cup and flipped the light switch to the room before starting back down the hallway. The only light came from his computer screen in the next room, and just as he reached the doorway he saw a shadow dart across the wall. Before he had even a chance to cry out or run he felt a hand encircle his wrist and another clap quickly over this mouth. He jerked violently, spilling the piping hot coffee over his captor’s body. Feeling his grip loosen he tried to pull himself free, only to be throw into his desk, scattering papers and other debris to the floor. He continued to struggle, the fight-or-flight hormone raging in his blood, but his captor was no amateur and his last conscious feeling was of an acidy smell and a metallic taste in his mouth.

The only problem is…Im not sure WHY he is getting kidnapped……Any ideas?????

answer as many as you like the one who gets the most right win 10 points
1. Why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways?

2. Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

3. Can I yell "movie" in a crowded firehouse?

4. Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

5. How do a fool and his money GET together?

6. Why does Hawaii have interstate highways?

7. How is it that a building burns up as it burns down?

8. If a train station is where the train stops, what is a workstation?

9. If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?

10. If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax?

11. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

12. What hair color do they put on the driver’s licenses of bald men?

13. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

14. Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds" fee on money they already know you don’t have?

15. Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines?

16. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

17. If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?

18. What are Preparation A through Preparation G?

19. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?

20. Did Washington flash a quarter when asked for ID?

21. How come there aren’t B batteries?

22. If the post office has machines that can sort snail mail at 1000’s of times per minute, then why do they give it to a little old man on a bike to deliver?

23. How do "Do not walk on the grass" signs get there?

24. Why do black olives come in cans and green olives come in jars?

25. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?

26. How is it possible to have a civil war?

27. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

28. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

29. If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2?

30. Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?

31. If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?

32. Crime doesn’t pay…does that mean that my job is a crime?

33. How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

34. How do you know that honesty is the best policy until you have tried some of the others?

35. How do you throw away a garbage can?

36. How does a thermos know if the drink should be hot or cold?

37. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

38. Do you realize how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?

39. If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?

40. If you’re in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

41. What happens to an 18 hour bra after 18 hours?

42. Why didn’t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

43. Why do hot dogs come 10 to a package and hot dog buns only 8?

44. Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings and then put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up?

45. Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman’s chest, but he ducks when the gun is thrown at him?

46. Why is it that night falls but day breaks?

47. Why is it that you must wait until night to call it a day?

48. What if the Hokey Pokey IS what its all about?

49. When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you’re just sitting there, staring at carpeting?

50. What happened to the first 6 "ups"?

Under Bush, people were able to buy a 20oz bottle of soda for a mere .00 — some machines even offer it for as little as {content}.80! But these machines have STOLEN jobs from deserving Americans. Therefore, Obama has proposed that a law be enacted which requires a Certified Vending Machine Operator (CVMO) be present at each machine when a purchase is made.

"Essentially, these CVMOs will be present to take the money from the customers. The CVMO will then insert the money into the vending machine, and select the product the customer requests. We will provide training so that each CVMO will become proficient at operating the machine they are assigned to. This will stimulate the economy and provide jobs. This is the gateway to an America with a significantly smaller unemployment rate.", explained President elect Obama.

But some critics are skeptical of Obama’s change. CVMOs will earn a minimum of /hour and receive health, dental and other benefits. It is estimated that the average price of a 20oz soda will jump from {content}.80-1.00 to .95-.00. Likewise, snack, coffee, sandwich and other vending machines will need to raise their price to cover the expertise provided by the CVMO attending to the machine.

"This is just <censored> ridiculous!", exclaimed Andrew Pierce of Borchard Printing. "When I’m running late in the morning, I am sometimes forced to buy my lunch from vending machines at the office. I hate spending .00 for a <censored> lunch. This change will make the same lunch cost near ! I find it ironic that these people working as CVMOs are the ones who would need a CVMO to use a vending machine. This isn’t rocket science."

What is your opinion on the CHANGE Obama has in store for the vending industry? Considering each vending machine would require a CVMO, that is a lot of jobs throughout the US! Maybe he isn’t as stupid as conservatives made him out to be before the election?

Under Bush, people were able to buy a 20oz bottle of soda for a mere .00 — some machines even offer it for as little as {content}.80! But these machines have STOLEN jobs from deserving Americans. Therefore, Obama has proposed that a law be enacted which requires a Certified Vending Machine Operator (CVMO) be present at each machine when a purchase is made.

"Essentially, these CVMOs will be present to take the money from the customers. The CVMO will then insert the money into the vending machine, and select the product the customer requests. We will provide training so that each CVMO will become proficient at operating the machine they are assigned to. This will stimulate the economy and provide jobs. This is the gateway to an America with a significantly smaller unemployment rate.", explained President elect Obama.

But some critics are skeptical of Obama’s change. CVMOs will earn a minimum of /hour and receive health, dental and other benefits. It is estimated that the average price of a 20oz soda will jump from {content}.80-1.00 to .95-.00. Likewise, snack, coffee, sandwich and other vending machines will need to raise their price to cover the expertise provided by the CVMO attending to the machine.

"This is just <censored> ridiculous!", exclaimed Andrew Pierce of Borchard Printing. "When I’m running late in the morning, I am sometimes forced to buy my lunch from vending machines at the office. I hate spending .00 for a <censored> lunch. This change will make the same lunch cost near ! I find it ironic that these people working as CVMOs are the ones who would need a CVMO to use a vending machine. This isn’t rocket science."

What is your opinion on the CHANGE Obama has in store for the vending industry? Considering each vending machine would require a CVMO, that is a lot of jobs throughout the US! Maybe he isn’t as stupid as conservatives made him out to be before the election?

Here’s what I have so far:

Should theives attack, we have no fear, because all our drawers are safe right here.
A: Safe

Where star employees park their car, so they never have to walk too far.
A: Employee of the month parking space

Send me the paper, but not by mail, because these machines never fail.
A: Fax Machine

Barbequing food is always cool, unless the grill runs out of fuel.
A: Propane Tank

I still need:
1) Refrigerator
2) Coffee Area
3) Alarm
4) Credit Department
5) Interbranch Mail
6) Flag Pole
7) Employee Restroom
Label Printer
9) Fuel Pump
10) Loading Ramp